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And I know you never will rip my heart out. . . Listen to me again. [entries|friends|calendar]
Amandagirll:)

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[21 Mar 2006|07:49pm]
i hate boys.

i only like the ones that are assholes
the things you said, im rehearsing them.

[05 Feb 2006|08:38pm]
soooo i went to courtney's jackson house today and we walked around all day. we went from bartley rd to villanova drive walked around the circle. and back. talked to a cute boy at stop and shop and he laughed at us for only having $3.76

it was funnnnnnn<333333333333333333333333333333


i miss her a whole lot
the things you said, im rehearsing them.

awhhh<4 [04 Feb 2006|09:52pm]
FROM MINDY


Feb 4, 2006 9:47 PM

Amanda Amanda Amanda. i miss math. i miss you. i miss talking about crazy people running thru the woods wit guns and shooting up drugs. i miss spittin in milkshakes. i miss ritin notes back and forth on a little notebook. i miss copying off you on tests and quizzes. i miss making fun of mr bs ties. i miss talkin bout people. i miss sharing stories about gayy ass ex-boyfriends. i miss our problem solving sessions. i miss makin noises wit yur picture fun wen theres a substitute. i miss going on gayy hayrides with you then yellin at the "scary" people before they yelled at us. i miss you leaving yur fone in my pocket so i take it home for an entire weekend nd havta talk to all these weird people who call you. i miss using that plump lip stuff then running out of class cuz it burned lyk a bitch. i miss giving you cookies so yu can drop them on the floor lyk a dumbass.i miss us falling asleep in math and never paying attention. i miss having you yell out ni99@ so we almost get beat up by a bunch of black kids. i miss ritin notes to yu on our dry erasee boards so mr.b can scream at us for talking across the room// or writing across the room. i miss talkin bout puttin rocks in snowballs to knock the other team we play unconcious. i miss talkin bout chinese . . things.i miss spittin my gum out in the hallways nd watchin to see if people step on it. i miss trading clothes even tho i completely dont fit into yur clothes cuz yur too short. i miss talkin bout getting raped at parties. i miss all the blonde moments we have. i miss doing shots with you at my house. i miss takin stupidd ass pictures at lyk 2 or 3 in the morning. I MISS MATH <3 I MISS YOU <3 I MISS EVERYTHING <3

YOUR MY BESTFRIEND IN THIS WORLD WHOM I TELL MY HEART TO. I LOVEE YOUU FOREVER NO MATTER WHAT. ALWAYS THERE FOR EACH OTHER TILL THE END <33

<33 BESTFRIEND FACE VERSION 2.




--------------------------------------------------
we're alot better then you.<3 i love her alottttttttt
2 comments|the things you said, im rehearsing them.

[04 Feb 2006|07:53pm]
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

i hate livejournal. i cant write anything because the ppl i wanna write about read it lol.
oh well. no more livejournal
the things you said, im rehearsing them.

[27 Jan 2006|01:35pm]
i like back stabbers their pretty cool?
the things you said, im rehearsing them.

ugh. [23 Jan 2006|08:37pm]
IDFK anymore.
why does this have to be so complicated.
$%*(%^*#

I CANT EVEN TYPE IT IN HERE. AND IT WOULD BE SUCH A STUPID THING TO DO OR EVEN CONSIDER.
but w.e nothing will ever work out.


all i want to do is push him farther and father away from me so maybe i can teach myself that i dont always need to forgive everyone. but on the other hand it feels wrong. it wouldnt ever happen anyway.

i find myself giving him 1 word answers. avoiding him. and not even being able to even talk in complete sentences when hes around.

i just want everything to stop and go back to where everything was okay.
the things you said, im rehearsing them.

[19 Jan 2006|08:01pm]
umn yesturday it was like a tornado outside :)
it was cool. i made my daddy drive me to schoool lol.
didnt do anything all that day.

today.
went to school in my pj's <3 i love them. was bored all day.
saw the boy i really like. to bad im shy when i first talk to people.
kinda sucks. but im really happy.
<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3
the things you said, im rehearsing them.

mm bad day x alot [15 Jan 2006|10:29pm]
[ mood | worried ]

okay got up at like 10 becos my mom called to wake me up becos shes in PA. I had to go out in like 30 degree weather to feed my horses.. so i wasnt really happy. tiffany called to ask me if i wanted to go to the mall with her and i was like "yeah sure why not but you gotta have me back by 1:30." so shes like alright ill be there in like 15 mins. she calls me back to say her car door is frozen and her 19 year old exboyfriend is driving us. im like "ehh alrighT?" so she gets lost. and it was like 30 minutes later. we had to pick some people up and we were on our way. the roads were like really really icy though and the kid went around a turn doing like 60mph and couldnt stop. the car went flying sideways into the other lane and another car was coming fast. so they slammed on the brakes and we did a complete 360. and hit a tree.. i've never been in an accident or anything like that and it was the worst experience i've ever felt. the car was about 3 seconds to late from smashing into my door and killing me...

went to bethanys party and pretty much had a nervous break down when i got there. idk.
my lifes pretty fucked up now. everything bad is happening all at once

the things you said, im rehearsing them.

fight?! [14 Jan 2006|10:13pm]
so umn yeah the rumors were true. i was fighting with someone. so stfu. i cant talk about it on here or i get in trouble by the police. harrassment and some shit. whatever so yeah.
the things you said, im rehearsing them.

. [04 Jan 2006|02:29pm]
whoaa sup green!?
4 comments|the things you said, im rehearsing them.

uhmn. fucking awsome weekend [30 Dec 2005|12:02am]
alright. i went to the mall with kristy becos we're awsome. met these 2 boys. one was a fagg the other was alright. stayed with them until one of them called kristy a slut. then she got all mad and we left. so we went to see tommy dee at ruby tuesdays becos he works there and it was funny. hes pretty cute. talked to him for like a half hour. left so he wouldn't get in trouble. then we walked around some more. went to abercrombie to annoy kristy. like 2 hours later tommy called to say he was off work. so we walked around with him.. went home. got clothes and stuff and my mom dropped us off at kristys.

like .74 seconds after we got out of the car cody attacked us with pizza and we almost died. so we walked to her neighbors and shes like "its to quiet" so im like "uhh im afraid of the dark.. stfu" and shes like "MICHEAL I BROUGHT SLUTS FOR YOU" and i was like "umn 1. and im not a slut..idiot" and he didn't coem out.. so im like .."lets just walk faster!!" and we were about halfway there and mike comes running out and he like drop kicked kristy. it was funny as hell. im so happy he didnt get the wrong girl though.. becos that wouldnt have been funny. Codys like "GET THE DUCK TAPE!". and i was like "oh no!.. KRISTY RUN!!"
we got away..it was traumatic... but it was still funny. lol

went to see ashley. went back to kristys. mike went to sleep.

PLAYED TRUTH OR DARE.with cody, fitz, and kristy. till like 4:30am ...hooked up && all that. enough said. kristy(you makeout first)rofl<3
umn kristys couch is little. and there was 4 of us. hahaha so yeah.. around 5 we all dozed off.
woke up at like 8. mad tired.

cute weekend. hahaha
the things you said, im rehearsing them.

ROFL. whatever [23 Dec 2005|07:20pm]
so by now i find the whole fucking situation hilarious and i cant imagine was i was so upset over him. not like i was anything special in the first place. whatever.

anyway. yeah so i havn't been updating bcos my computer is all fucked up and wont let me on LJ at all. its all good though bcos i get a new one for xmas.

i like this new kid a whole lot. but idk if i would wanna go out with him or anything..

went to the mall with my brother the other day and met andy. it was pretty sweet. foodfights and messy hair<4 hahaha

i am planning on cutting my hair . short. very. idk. different color too?
gimmie ur input.

and its friday night. and im bored. so you should come over or do something
the things you said, im rehearsing them.

[14 Dec 2005|06:09pm]
SO UMN. EVERYTHINGS CONSTANTLY FUCKED UP.

LETS COMPETE TO SEE WHO CAN PISS OFF THE OTHER ONE MORE..
CAUSE IT FEELS LIKE WE'RE DOING IT ALREADY.
1 comment|the things you said, im rehearsing them.

haha its a best friend kinda thing [11 Dec 2005|12:08am]
uHh iTs MinDy: haha nd i know these people?
CrimeSeenR0mance: nahh
uHh iTs MinDy: hhaa WTF YUR SO DUMBB!! WERE YU BORN A BLONDE??
CrimeSeenR0mance: no i know them. but u dont
CrimeSeenR0mance: well u do. but i didnt get the question
CrimeSeenR0mance: haha
uHh iTs MinDy: wat??????
CrimeSeenR0mance: nvm
CrimeSeenR0mance: idkidkidk
uHh iTs MinDy: ahahaha yur an idiot.
CrimeSeenR0mance: thanks
CrimeSeenR0mance: i posted 3 bulletons with the topic NIGGER. and a whole bunch of black kids messaged me saying their going to find me and jump me :-(
CrimeSeenR0mance: i am scared
uHh iTs MinDy: HAHAHA THATS THE FUNIEST THING I EVER HEARD.
CrimeSeenR0mance: no its not
CrimeSeenR0mance: black kids are tuff
uHh iTs MinDy: OH YESS . . IT IS FUNNY
CrimeSeenR0mance: im going to get shot and its funny?!
uHh iTs MinDy: hahhahaahahahahaha im sorry
CrimeSeenR0mance: ur mean
uHh iTs MinDy: hahaha no no no why wood yu think that. hahahahahahahaha

Auto response from CrimeSeenR0mance:
mindy just told me to get shot

uHh iTs MinDy: i did not!
CrimeSeenR0mance: did to
CrimeSeenR0mance: nigger. im going to bed.
CrimeSeenR0mance: ahh. i DID NOT say nigger. i REPEAT. i DID NOT say nigger
uHh iTs MinDy: HAHAHA

Auto response from CrimeSeenR0mance:
uHh iTs MinDy: go get shot. your so fucking stupid

uHh iTs MinDy: I SO DID NOT SAY THAT YU LIAR!!! HAHAHAHA
CrimeSeenR0mance: :-D but noone else knows that
uHh iTs MinDy: HAHAHA FAGGOT!!
CrimeSeenR0mance: rofl
CrimeSeenR0mance: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
uHh iTs MinDy: NOT THIS AGEN. ROFL ROFL ROFL ROFL. OKAY MOFUCKA.
CrimeSeenR0mance: yo stfu
CrimeSeenR0mance: dont copy me u whore
uHh iTs MinDy: hahaha
uHh iTs MinDy: dont copy me whore.
CrimeSeenR0mance: make ur font smaller idiot
uHh iTs MinDy: make ur font smaller idiot.
uHh iTs MinDy: i lovvee you amanda. hahahahahaha
CrimeSeenR0mance: yp ur dead
CrimeSeenR0mance: yo*
uHh iTs MinDy: yp ur dead
CrimeSeenR0mance: im telling those niggers it was you
uHh iTs MinDy: yo*
CrimeSeenR0mance: i MEAN DARKLY COLORED SKIN BOYS!
uHh iTs MinDy: im telling those niggers it was you.
uHh iTs MinDy: i mean darkly colored skin boys.
uHh iTs MinDy: hahahahahaahahahahaha
CrimeSeenR0mance: stfu
CrimeSeenR0mance: stfu
uHh iTs MinDy: stfu.
CrimeSeenR0mance: ahhhhh
uHh iTs MinDy: stfu
uHh iTs MinDy: ahhh
CrimeSeenR0mance: forget it. ill just give myself to the black kids
CrimeSeenR0mance: its better then you
uHh iTs MinDy: hahahaha ok.
uHh iTs MinDy:</font> hahaha
CrimeSeenR0mance: shut up
CrimeSeenR0mance: !
uHh iTs MinDy: hahahahahahaha
CrimeSeenR0mance: :cries: ur bad at being a best friend
uHh iTs MinDy: hahaha. im sorry i got yur back i swear. ill juss pull out my air soft gun nd shoot em back.
CrimeSeenR0mance: :-[
uHh iTs MinDy: WERE IN HICKTOWN ND YU WANT ME TO GET A REAL GUNN???
CrimeSeenR0mance: shyea'
uHh iTs MinDy: HAHAHAHAHA
uHh iTs MinDy: WAT R U ON?? HAHA THE CLOSEST THING WE GOT TO A GUN HERE IS ONE OF THOSE AMAZING WATER GUNS. HHA THEY COOL. NDI DUNT EVEN HAVE ONE OF THOSE.
CrimeSeenR0mance: i have a paintball gun
CrimeSeenR0mance: and a bbgun
CrimeSeenR0mance: and a pistol mothafucka
uHh iTs MinDy: hahahha watcha gunna do wit a freakin bbgun shoot em in they black ass.
uHh iTs MinDy: hahahaha
CrimeSeenR0mance: yeah. my brother shot me with it by accident and he got grounded for 4 months.
uHh iTs MinDy is away at 12:04:59 AM.
CrimeSeenR0mance: nigger!
uHh iTs MinDy: hahahaha !!!
2 comments|the things you said, im rehearsing them.

So... ummm [09 Dec 2005|05:01pm]
[ mood | peaceful ]

Lifes good. . lol. I am back to the way I used to be. Obnoxious, hyper, constantly smiling, you know the deal. Got good grades again this marking period :) another 100$ for me lol. I am going to miss Mindy once our classes get moved :( but I still have another month. BFF for lifee girlly.

I'm really really bored right now lol. Chances are that I'm going to Mindy's<3 and idk about tomarrow

So yeah. everythings good. haha





I just wish that I could go back to day 1 with you......

2 comments|the things you said, im rehearsing them.

mmk [07 Dec 2005|02:10pm]
[ mood | infuriated ]

Fuck you...this was everything everyone said it would be.
Why dont I ever just listen to what people say.
Instead of being the one that see's you do no wrong.
WHEN REALLY NO MATTER how much you get mad at me, or how many times you yell at me for something I didn't even do. I still am back where I started. It's the same thing everytime. I'm right at your feet willing to forgive everything.

Instead of thinking I cant get hurt..
maybe I should realize I can...and I did.
I could probably die and you would not even notice.
Everything was a lie. There were no second chances.
AND don't tell me I talk shit either because you should hear what people say about you. And you should hear MY responce.
Because it sure as hell isn't that I agree.
This is bullshit.
FUCK EVERYTHING
I FUCKING GIVE UP

2 comments|the things you said, im rehearsing them.

Whats upp kidzz<3 [01 Dec 2005|11:28pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]
[ music | Finch-Ender ]

So yea I am having an interesting month. I have run out of tears and feeling bad for myself. I gave up blaming myself. And thats pretty much it. Its like "wow amanda you fucked everything up, and then u fucked up whatever was left, and then while trying to fix it..you just fucked it up somemore". So yeah. it's umm.. alright now. Boys have no conception of how a relationship should end. Their shouldn't be rumors, hate, & lies.

I lost someone I trusted..
and I pretty much handed him my heart hands down.
Its not like I can even say I'm mad at him. Because I'm not and I cant say I hate him. Because I dont. I guess this is what happens when you fall to fast..
Things are good though. We talk..more now.

Other then how I feel. I'd like everyone who is spreading rumors about me to cut the shit. Seriously.. I didn't do anything to you. Some of them are so rediculous that it's not even possible for them to be true. Come on' grow up.

And thatss about it for now. <3

2 comments|the things you said, im rehearsing them.

... [28 Nov 2005|03:25pm]
[ mood | sad ]
[ music | The Scene Aesthetic- Beauty in the Breakdown ]

Okay. So I lied..




Maybe I just miss you.
3 comments|the things you said, im rehearsing them.

alrighttt [28 Nov 2005|01:57pm]
[ mood | confused ]
[ music | My black dahlia-hollywood undead ]

Well.
My lifes interesting right now.
I don't really have any plans.
I don't know what I wanna do at the moment.
I don't like anyone.
I want a boyfriend again.
End of story.



oh yeah.. cheakk outtt thee new myspace. and the pixx<3

www.myspace.com/iloveyoux3

the things you said, im rehearsing them.

12 Days Later.... [22 Nov 2005|07:15pm]
[ mood | frustrated ]

Alright. Bad 2 weeks I dont update anymore because it's no ones business. So unless you know what's wrong with me lately don't ask.. I'm fine. Chances are unless your name is Mindy you only know pieces...

onto a different subject.I'd like to say that girls are back stabbing bitchs once again. And i promise you'll hear me say it again. If you talked to me last friday you have seen me at my worst. So hear it is. This is a friends only entry and im saying everything. nothing is made up or untrue. And im not keeping anything.

I am admiting i've been sad lately. nothing like calling my self a stupid jealous girl. I kind of feel like i want to live in my own world where all eyes are off my boyfriend. yes you heard me. I can't stand it when girls are all over another girls boyfriend let alone my own. I have a tendency to want to lock him up from the rest of the world. although i cant. He's just being himself yeah i know but it kills me. I feel like i cant tell him anything because im afraid he'll get mad. the first 2 weeks were amazing. i swore to god i was in love with him. I want to be with him forever. I'm doing everything i can to keep myself in place.I cannot mess up, not this time.. i dont want this to be an 'i told you so amanda' type of thing. because i mean everything i say to him. i really do. when i say i love you its not the same as when i've said it before.... but now i feel as though im losing him more and more. it scares me to think of the next week. it scares me to think of tomarrow. i know what will happen if we do break up. i know exactly. i've learned to trust a boyfriend for the first time in my life. i thought promises were promises. But im not so sure if i can keep this one together. i dont want to have a breakup. i ask my friends about it only for the word to get out that i said something to someone and i end up paying for it. Sorry? idk. my life went from ...

fine- before i met him,
to AMAZING- once i met him,
to OMFG I LOVE MY LIFE I LOVE THIS KID- when i started going out with him,
to disaster.

we are not broken up dont ask me. dont question my profile. dont ask me how things are. im not telling anyone anything anymore..look were it got me.
I'm finished with the jealousy. this is it.

2 comments|the things you said, im rehearsing them.

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